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Monday, March 24, 2014

This is the Best.

Quite possibly my most favorite picture of all time. 

For five whole minutes I had their attention, 
no whining, no arguing, no baby tears.
Maybe a little bribery but how else do 
mamas get pictures. 

This picture was about ten seconds after we propped 
Adam up on his belly. 
The big kids thought it was absolutely hilarious. 

I love Ava's big girl toothy grin. 
I love Adam looking all awake and surprised. 
I love Luca giggling, watching the other two. 

The reality is that an hour later there was likely
a fight over Legos, feelings hurt when gum wasn't shared, 
a kid declaring this is, "the worst day ever",
a tired crabby baby and a mom still
not yet dressed for the day...
baseline household chaos. 

But this picture makes me happy.
really really happy

Monday, March 17, 2014

Friday, March 7, 2014

Two Months Old

Two months old. 
One more month and I'll be back at work. 
Makes me teary eyed. 

Love this baby. 

There have been some long, hard days
days when I don't get dressed, brush my teeth
or barely get off the couch. 
Days when I'm tired and cranky and lacking patience. 
Stuck inside during a never ending winter. 
But stuck inside with a sweet sweet baby. 
(except from 5-7pm when he screams) 

Fussy days, sleepless days, gassy days. 

But now, he smiles. He coos. 
He takes breaks from nursing to shoot me a grin. 
He's happy when sleeping belly to belly 
or tucked in the sling.

Snuggly days, hungry days, lovey days. 

Love this baby. 

Sweet Thang

Saturday, March 1, 2014

Photo Goals

My goal for 2014 is to get into the pictures with my family. 

When I scan through the past several years the number of 
pictures of me with my kids is so small. Too small. 
Even fewer are the pictures with both Dustin and I. 
Admittedly I have likely deleted many handfuls of pictures 
due to a double chin, excess arm fat or some other 
super critical view of myself. 
I don't want my kids to look back and wonder
where mom was. 

So, either I'm passing the camera on to family and friends
or setting the self timer for candid day to day snaps. 

Oh and also I should back up all my pictures, make albums,
actually print some pictures, make memory books for the kids,
finish baby books and learn to properly use my camera.

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Cookie Sales

This is Ava's first year selling Girl Scout cookies 
and wow is she excited. 
Door to door in the snow, texting family and friends 
on my phone, booth sales at the grocery store...
this girl is trying hard for the sale. 

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Thursday, January 30, 2014


What is this word "bedtime" you keep talking about?

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Saturday, January 25, 2014

Great Grandma

Great Grandma Phyllis has had a lot going on and wasn't able to travel to Madison. 
We made the trip to Rib Lake and are now seriously considering a mini van.
Sending healing thoughts your way Great Grandma.

Grandpa and Grandma

Monday, January 20, 2014

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

One Week Old

Big sissy Ava is such a little mama. She would like to be involved in every diaper change, burping session, clothing change and bath. If she could nurse him she would. I love her excitement and love for her little brother even though it is sometimes trying on my patience. She is so so good to me too. She will refill my water glass or bring me more pillows to prop Adam on and sit by my side while he nurses. 

Big brother Luca seems like he has matured before our eyes. He loves his little brother but doesn't need to be involved in everything like Ava. He's a five year old boy after all. A 30 second snuggle or a bedtime kiss on the head and he's good. I can't wait for the days when Adam starts to interact with the kids, Luca is going to think it is the absolute best when Adam smiles and laughs at him. 

Three kids. Whoa. 

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Adam Jacob Dolezalek

born 1-7-14
12:28 am
7 pounds 13 ounces
21.5 inches long
brown hair, dark blue eyes
super cute

fast and furious and born in the water. 

if you want the super long version read on,
mostly it's for me - to remember the details. 

Of course it was the coldest day yet of the year when I went into labor. After two weeks of contracting off and on I knew it was the real deal by about 5pm. I had worked the night before, slept pretty well all day long and then woke to a feeling of the baby lower and contractions more regular. We made it through dinner time and bedtime with Ava and Luca (although I did read Luca's story on my hands and knees). I showered, finished packing the hospital bag and tried watching some tv as a distraction. My mom was going to head over after her dinner out yet when she stopped at home to pick up Max she found her house at 55 degrees and the furnace off. Shit. She was able to get someone out to the house quickly and made it to our house a little after 11pm. I honestly don't think we would have left the house any sooner but it was a good thing she came when she did. 

Dustin had let the truck warm for a good 30 minutes but it still felt frigid. I clutched the hand bar and told Dustin to drive slowly. Those bumps really suck. I made it up to the birthing center with a few stops along the way, now tearful with contractions and a little fearful of what I knew was coming. 

Some friends ask me if it's weird to have a baby where I work - wondering mainly if it's awkward later knowing your friends have seen you buck naked, screaming and swearing. Surprisingly it's not, at least not for me. When I walked into my room (perks of working there is that you can bipass triage) and saw my friend Megan I felt relief. I felt like I was safe. I knew that whatever happened I was in good hands. I also knew that drugs were close by should I need them.

When Carol the midwife checked me at 11:45 I was 5cm. I was bummed to not be more dilated but I also remembered the craziness of Luca's birth of 4cm to birth in an hour and a half. Little did I know that I would cut that time in half and be holding my baby in 45 minutes. 45 wild, painful, head spinning minutes. 
I have always been impressed with Dustin's support while I'm in labor. He is 100% present and willing to do whatever I need him to do to get through. This time it was pretty much just letting me put a death grip around his neck and keep telling me that I could do this even though I was doubting it...aloud, over and over. I didn;t have time for the massage oils, the chill playlist, the antibiotics. It didn't matter. I spent some time laboring on the toilet and then I knew it was time. I got into the tub. 

Megan says I was in the tub only ten minutes before he was born. I think I was in a out of body experience in those ten minutes. I remember my labor and delivery nurse mind sort of seeing it all happen, knowing it was normal and that it would be over soon. My crazy fast laboring body didn't agree with the rational nurse. I remember Megan excitedly bringing in warm water and blankets and trying to be encouraging that the end was near and looking at her like she must be crazy. Those last few contractions though we came together, I held on to Dustin and I pushed my baby out.  

A boy. Wow. A boy. 
I helped bring him out of the water, he made a few little cries and then he was calm and alert. We stayed in the water and just gazed at him. His little round head, soft soft skin, big open eyes. I remember kissing Dustin and him telling me what a great job I did. I remember thinking "I did it" followed by "I don't ever want to do it again". 

Adam, we love you.
Your big brother and sister are going to love you. 
Welcome little love. 

Thursday, January 2, 2014

I don't want to go to work anymore.

come out baby.
ready for you.